The Practical Guide to Practically Everything

2 brown cows to make chocolate milk. (mine ran away)

Hiding spots big enough to hide 2 brown cows.

1 four-eyed purple alien, specializing in hunting down missing pencils.

1 rich family wishing they had a child. Contact Sally Mae at 1-4Money.

1 antique staple gun to be used in big heisting (Editor's note: we hope he means hoisting).

1 good editor to filter out want ads in PGPE. Contact Nandr at the office.